I’ve been lucky enough to go to some wonderful restaurants recently, but jokes about bad ones have always made me laugh. Here are eight of my favourites.
Diner: Excuse me, will my burger be long?
Waiter: No sir, it will be round.
Diner: This steak is raw. I said well done!
Waiter: Why thank you, sir.
Diner: Please call the manager. I can’t eat this terrible food.
Waiter: It’s no use, sir. He won’t eat it either.
Diner: Hang on! What’s your thumb doing on my steak?
Waiter: I don’t want it to fall on the floor again, sir.
Diner: Waiter, what’s this fly doing in my soup?
Waiter: Um, looks to me to be backstroke, sir…
Diner: Waiter, there is a fly in the butter!
Waiter: Yes sir, it’s a butterfly!
Diner: Waiter! This coffee takes like mud.
Waiter: Well sir, it was only ground this morning.
Diner: This fish isn’t as good as what I ordered here last month.
Waiter: That’s funny. It’s from the same fish.
Alex Raphael 