I went to a faith healing group. It was rubbish! Even the bloke in a wheelchair got up and walked out.
My dad always used to say “The first rule of theatre is to always leave them wanting more.” Great bloke but a terrible anaesthetist.
Bono and the Edge walk into a bar. The barman says “Oh no, not U2 again!”
Last time I went to Blackpool I went on a donkey. It took me six days to get there!
Has anyone seen my Gone in 60 Seconds Blu-ray? It was here a minute ago.
The Disappointment Club is delighted to announce the cancellation of its annual dinner.
I joined a Thesaurus Club last night and they said that the first rule of Thesaurus Club is, you don’t talk about, mention, speak of, discuss, gossip about, chat about, colloquy, parley or deliberate on Thesaurus Club.
A thief has stolen all the motorway signs from Yorkshire. Police are currently looking for Leeds.