Gr8at: #BeautifulLibraries

I haven’t been doing much reading as I’ve been busy writing. But if I was in one of these liteart sanctuaries, that would definitely change! Here are eight of the world’s most beautiful libraries from all around the world. Do you have a favourite?

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Gr8at: #TheTigerKing

Tiger King

The Tiger King has been the record-breaking documentary of the summer, focusing in the world of big cats conservation and the eccentric characters within it. Pivotal to the Netflix series is the role between Joe Exotic the self-confessed “gay, gun-carrying redneck with a mullet” and Carole Baskin, described by her husband as the “Mother Teresa of cats”. Here are eight quotes that help sum up the madness and mayhem with the seven part series.

You can see how they go from being so sweet to tearing your face off, just like that, and it’s amazing to have that range.” – Carole Baskin

People don’t come to see the tigers; they come to see me.” – Joe Exotic

“I don’t watch news on television, unless there’s a cat involved.” – Carole Baskin

I can assure you’re going to get closer to tigers and lions here than you would anywhere in the world. Matter of fact, you’re gonna get so close I can almost promise you some of you will be urinated on. – Joe Exotic

“This is my little town. I’m the mayor, the prosecutor, the cop, and executioner.” – Joe Exotic

“Ladies and gentlemen, before you hear it on the news, I’m gonna tell you myself. About an hour ago, we had an incident where one of the employees stuck their arm through the cage and a tiger tore her arm off. I can give you your money back, or I can give you a rain check. Why don’t you come back at another day?” – Joe Exotic

“People Every Day Are Like, ‘You Must Have The Most Incredible Life To Live With 187 Big Cats.'” – Joe Exotic

“I really appreciate the fact that none of these people like me.” – Carole Baskin

Gr8at: Funniest #HomerSimpson Scenes

I’m such a big fan of The Simpsons. There can’t be too many who aren’t. It was a big part of my comedic childhood and I’ve mentioned it countless times on my blog, going back to early September 2013 and this wit from Homer. Have eight very funny scenes starring the man himself. Feel free to let me know your favourite or any other memorable jokes from the show.

The scene that has made me laugh most. Poor Homer!

 

I still can’t hear the word incognito without thinking of this happy, and rather luckless, soul.

 

Homer sure does love his confectionary!

 

“You know boy, I don’t think I’ve ever felt as close to you as I do right…”

 

Hilarious even if you haven’t seen Indiana Jones.

 

Two great scenes in one here. And jokes on chocolate always get bonus points.

 

Not the most visual of scenes, but it cracks me up every time.

 

As someone rather useless at DIY, I fully sympathise with Homer’s experiences with ‘Le Grill’.

Gr8at: #TwoSentenceHorror

I saw an article on Two Sentence Horror Stories that shows how a skilled writer can tell a story even in a few words. These are my favourites, but you can find more here nd plenty more under #TwoSentenceHorror Which one chills you most?

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I can see one year into the future.
Today the noise stopped.

While tidying my laboratory, I came across an unfamiliar notebook and opened the first page. 
“Warning: The subject still thinks he is the scientist.”

“I’ve always wondered, what’s the scythe for anyway?” I asked, as Death escorted me.”
“Protection,” he answered nervously.  

I told the genie that for my third and final wish, I wanted my family to be happy.
And I started fading. 

The driver wasn’t very chatty, so I checked my phone. 
“Hey it’s your Uber. I’m outside.” 

During dinner, she told me she knew my deep dark secret.
As she chewed her burger, I knew she was bluffing. 

I decided to kill off a few characters in the book I’m writing.
It would definitely spice up my autobiography a little. 

As I woke up in the middle of the night, I heard Alexa speak.
“OK, the security alarms have been disabled.”

Gr8at: #FunnyJokes

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I went to a faith healing group. It was rubbish! Even the bloke in a wheelchair got up and walked out.

My dad always used to say “The first rule of theatre is to always leave them wanting more.” Great bloke but a terrible anaesthetist.

Bono and the Edge walk into a bar. The barman says “Oh no, not U2 again!”

Last time I went to Blackpool I went on a donkey. It took me six days to get there!

Has anyone seen my Gone in 60 Seconds Blu-ray? It was here a minute ago.

The Disappointment Club is delighted to announce the cancellation of its annual dinner.

I joined a Thesaurus Club last night and they said that the first rule of Thesaurus Club is, you don’t talk about, mention, speak of, discuss, gossip about, chat about, colloquy, parley or deliberate on Thesaurus Club.

A thief has stolen all the motorway signs from Yorkshire. Police are currently looking for Leeds.

G8at: James Bond Commemorative Stamps

It’s only a few months before the latest James Bond film No Time to Die is released so it’s exciting times for 007. As part of the promotion, I saw on the BBC website that the Royal Mail were releasing stamps to celebrate the 25th film in the franchise. As I’ve done numerous Bond-themed posts including on his cars and the best songs I just had tovshare these with you. Would you buy any?

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Gr8at: International Landscape Photographer of the Year

Photography and travel are two big passisons of mine, so when I saw the BBC had highlighted entrants from The International Landcape Photographer of the year I just had to share my favourites with you. You can find the rest of the winners on the official competition website here, which were whittled down from 3,403 entries.

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PETER ADAM HOSZANG – Sharqiya Sands Desert, Oman

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BRANDON YOSHIZAWA – SpaceX rocket exhaust plume, Sierra Nevada, California, US

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IGNACIO PALACIOS – Lencois Maranhenses, Brazil

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CRAIG BILL – Page, Arizona, US

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ANKE BUTAWITSCH – Madeira, Portugal

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RICARDO DA CUNHA – West Mongolia

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PATRICK HERTZOG – Vatnajokull National Park, Iceland

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VESELIN ATANASOV – Central Balkan, Bulgaria

Gr8at: Quotes on Acting

As most of you’ll know, it’s the Oscar’s tonight. Here’s hoping it’s a memorable one. So as a warm up to the big event, here are some quotes on the whole acting process. You’ll find more at the Ace your Audition site.

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Acting is behaving truthfully under imaginary circumstances.
– Sanford Meisner

Without wonder and insight, acting is just a business. With it, it becomes creation.
– Bette Davis

The more personal, the more universal.
– Gary Ballinger

Every scene you will ever act begins in the middle, and it is up to you, the actor, to provide what comes before.
– Michael Shurtleff

Acting is all about honesty. If you can fake that, you’ve got it made.
– George Burns

I love acting. It is so much more real than life.
– Oscar Wilde

The work will stand, no matter what.
– Meryl Streep

Stop explaining yourself. Shut up and act!
– Craig MacDonald